Journal

I took medicine and followed a lot of advice, but there is no healing because the root cause is mental. I get it now: my childhood pattern of working under doubt, checking things 2 to 3 times to make sure I understand correctly, and carrying that constant burden is what causes the intense mental exhaustion that weakens my brain nerves. True healing won't come from medicine alone; it requires breaking this deep-seated habit of doubt and over-checking.

Exhausting head pain today. Realized the low blood pressure theory is completely wrong. Ghabrahat (anxiety) is very low. Smoked 3 Bidis, but then made a firm decision to quit completely. Still experiencing speaking/speech issues, likely due to nerve weakness or neurological issues. Maintained a healthy diet and followed calorie intake.

I tried to pray but it didn't work or I am failed to do it right way

After evening I feel so much good. I find out my core problem is low blood pressure. and whenever I got low blood pressure I feel confusion, low focus, bokhalana and similar problems. Also drained energy. and it's solution I find out that, If I get creatine it improves my blood pressure which increases my performance. So whenever I feel exhausted, brain nerves pain, confusion, overthinking, or drained energy, it means my blood pressure is low. now everything is very clear, my symptoms, problems why I was facing them. Actually I didn't have weak nerves or problem from smoking. I didn't have any problem only low blood pressure. Which I can mange easily. Q. What drained your energy today, and what gave it back? Thinking fantasies, like alia and merrut scnerios, which is sense less, and drained my enery, I got nothing just fake dopamine.

After evening I feel so much good. I find out my core problem is low blood pressure. and whenever I got low blood pressure I feel confusion, low focus, bokhalana and similar problems. Also drained energy. and it's solution I find out that, If I get creatine it improves my blood pressure which increases my performance. So whenever I feel exhausted, brain nerves pain, confusion, overthinking, or drained energy, it means my blood pressure is low. now everything is very clear, my symptoms, problems why I was facing them. Actually I didn't have weak nerves or problem from smoking. I didn't have any problem only low blood pressure. Which I can mange easily.

Yesterday or few day before. Last few days, I chose comfort over discomfort. I entertained myself a lot, watching dramas, movies and skipped my diet plans. I took bedee and masturbate on 31 july. Didn't follow my priorities : Workout Tasks Forget about change. Diet

Today Feels fine, because I find out taking creatine is really helping me to improve my mental health. Finding out creatine is really helping me to get a better mental health.

I identified last three days, I follow a few bad behaviours : I took too much smoking from past 4 days. I masturbate yesterday (friday). I was working on laptop adding features on app while I have head pain. And I still work, didn't care about it, like I didn't have control on it. An Abnormal behaviour.

Woke up strong at 6:00 AM, read my morning affirmations, and got 30 push-ups done. Great start to the day.